Thursday, October 3, 2013
On a mother's note, even though Zara has been a bit challenging lately and has tested my patience I feel so happy and full of love for the little being that she is becoming. I feel like all I want to do is support who she is becoming, do my best to teach her emotional intelligence, help her understand that her wants and my wants will need to co-exist, and show her feelings, wants and needs respect. Being an educator to so many young people I have to say that I believe in Positive Behavior Support (PBS) whole heartedly and I really feel that if I can implement this into my parenting style that even though challenging moments will present themselves in the long run it will pay off.
On a personal note I am coming to terms with the fact that I cannot be the "perfect" woman/mother. I cannot cook gourmet meals, clean, do all the laundry, do all the dishes, have a perfect body, have a clean home, work almost full time and still be a present, loving, compassionate and fun mom. I cannot do it all so I am having to let go of that. I read a blog the other day about this illusion of being the perfect woman and how so many of those idealisms have carried over from the 1950's. Being a working mother I have to take care of my child, myself and my relationship before making sure everything else is done. I keep up fairly well but I do have to say that I go 100 mph all day long and into the evening. I rarely have time to do things for me but I do sneak in a yoga class at least once a week and do my best to read a chapter in a book maybe once a week, sometimes more. I feel balanced emotionally and physically but I have to keep my head above water long enough to find that balance. Motherhood is no joke ladies!
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
opposite has occurred, she loves it more than ever so I am still tired, sleep deprived, and feeling chubby. Oh well, it is the best "food" for her to eat, she is so strong and smart and someday will stop sucking me dry. I have gone back to work and Zara seems perfectly happy saying good-bye in the mornings. She loves spending time with her papa and is spending a few afternoon's each week with our friend Laura and her 6 month old Baby girl. Overall life could not be any better, even with life getting busier I feel excited to teach art and reconnect with my students.
Friday, June 21, 2013
Sweet Zara Wheatley is 19 months old. She is still a driven, smart, beautiful, sweet, feisty, and all around amazing little lady. She is talking, expressing herself, and putting words together into short sentences. This evening she bumped her head on the faucet in the bath tub and she kept saying "sad mama, sad" and frowning into the mirror. Everywhere we go she points at different things and says what they are. She is really listening and paying attention to the world around her. Zara has temper tantrums but she seems to pull herself together pretty easily and as long as she is healthy she seems to sleep pretty constantly. She is so sweet, giving mama hugs and kisses all the time. We are having such a fun summer together, I am so happy that we have this time and will have this time together every year. I am so happy, tired but happy. Have I gotten my "body back"? No. Do I have time to read, draw, paint, do yoga, meditate, etc? No. Do I work my tail off all day and sometimes all night. Yes. But do I love almost every second of it? Yes. I love being a mama to this amazing little lady. I love watching her evolve and become more and more of who she is. I love walking around the block with her while she walks and smells the flowers while holding lucy's leash. I don't really care that I am not wearing a size 4, I do not care if I do not have alone time to reflect because I am so happy with what I do get. So much time with this beautiful soul that entered the world through my body.
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Friday, January 11, 2013
From mama's point of view I would like to express some reflection on my parenting style. I tried reading the books, listening to what others told me to do, follow social norms but quickly I realized that the only way for me to parent is from my own intuition. I feel that Zara's needs are met, she is happy and supported and has thrived from the moment she arrived. I sometimes feels people's judgements, I can hear their thoughts that Zara may be spoiled or bratty from the love she is receiving but I feel very strongly that we are instilling empathy in Zara and that will not create a bratty and spoiled child. Supporting her, nursing her, sleeping with her and responding to her cries is not going to create a monster child who gets what she wants all the time and thinks the world revolves around her. I feel very strongly that making sure that Zara has what she needs will only create a stronger bond between us in turn creating a child that respects us, loves us, and chooses to do the right thing not because of a reward but because she feels good about it. I realize that a lot of my parenting decisions can be linked to attachment parenting styles and that is fine but what happened in our society to make unattached parenting the norm. Why is it that every other nation in the world practices attachment parenting, breast feeding their babies like nature intended, sleeping with their babies, responding to their babies cries, carrying their babies, and staying close and connected. Why is it that our society has such a problem with violent behaviors, could it be linked to these people living an unattached life where they do not attach to their parents and so do not make the attachment to the rest of mankind. Just a little stream of consciousness, I do feel that Zara is getting all that Darren and I have to give and more and I feel very strongly that it can only benefit her in the long run. YES I will breastfeed Zara until she weens herself, YES I will co-sleep with Zara until she is developmentally ready to make the decision to sleep in her own bed, and YES I will hold her when she cries and I will wear her on my body because it makes both of us happy:)
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
What a wonderful journey this is, I am excited for every coming moment and look forward to the years to come.
Happy Birthday baby Z!
Saturday, October 20, 2012
Sweet Z is still not walking on her own even though she has been caught taking a few steps here and there. I feel like she does not want to walk yet, like she is not ready to grow up so fast. That is okay with me, she will walk for the rest of her life so I think it is great if she just wants to crawl around a little longer.
I am doing well, feeling more and more like myself even though I have not really figured how to fit it all in yet. I really want to make a commitment to working out but just have not had the time do that. I know it will happen in time so I am just trying to be patient with myself.
Life is good! I love being Zara's mama more than I could have ever imagined and I think it is just going to get more and more fun as the years go on. The love I am filled with is beyond words:)